Karma is a Beautiful Thing

I always envisioned various forms of Karma for my dear friend the Dragon.

v  Loss of primary residency.

v  Max being awarded 50% access by a judge.

v  A judge telling her that she is not entitled to spousal support as she had a premarital affair and left Max for another woman.

Well Karma can come in more ambiguous ways.

In a recent mediation session, after hours of negotiation, the mediator comes into a small meeting space where Max and his lawyer sat and says a comment with regards to my Dragon friend. "I believe she wasn't ready to settle up until now as I believe she is just now getting over you." She said this is her impression based on some things that have been said and events that have occurred.

Interesting that a third party, someone who has only known Dragon for a short while, could come to that conclusion. That has always been our suspicion - that the Dragon's drive to burn us with her fumes stems from her jealousy and spite. She asked for Max back two years ago and he turned her down. Than for me to turn around and get pregnant months later, well that just changed everything - she was never getting him back. I had taken from her what she wanted so badly back, what she so regretted giving up - a life with Max.  Hence why she had turned around and suggested I trapped Max - because no way would he actually want to spend his life with me over her. Hence why she hates me so much and has tried to hurt me over and over. This explains why she has grown to hate Max so deeply. Spite: how dare you move on, you were supposed to be sitting waiting for me while I test the waters on the other side, and you weren't supposed to get over me. You are not supposed to be happy, as I am not. Jealousy and spite are toxic emotions. Fuel that with regret over giving up something great. A recipe for disaster.

Another interesting comment was made that day in mediation. The Dragon went on about how she hates that I come to Jessie's extra-curricular as I irritate her and I make comments to Jessie like "I love you, I will see you Wed”. Dragon tells the group in mediation “It bugs me, she bugs me". The mediator immediately says "why is it a bad thing that she shows affection towards your daughter?" Well of course she had no comment for that. She is right. Count your blessings Dragon. I could hate your daughter. I could treat her horribly. I could make her feel unwelcomed in our home. But instead I shower her with love, affection, admiration - I treat her as if she were one of my own. And that is another piece of your Karma! The fact that I love your daughter and your daughter loves me. The fact that when you see us together and there is affection, that bugs you. The fact that you harbor so much jealously. It eats away at you.

I have an ex-husband who has a new partner. Do I hate this partner? Am I jealous? No. For one I am grateful because she loves Caden and treats him with respect. And two, I am secure enough to not be jealous. I know that my relationship with Caden isn't in jeopardy because of this new person in his life.  Being so insecure must be in itself so difficult. To struggle daily with such insecurity and fear. More karma.

I suppose I am in a sense driving the Karma train! I am the source of all these toxic emotions of jealousy and spite and hatred. I have taken from the Dragon what she always thought would be waiting for her. I am the reason Max has moved on and feels at peace. I am happy. Max is happy. Jessie loves me. She is a welcomed part of our growing family. Chooooo Choooo....

And yes, the other big piece of her Karma is $$$$$$. The Dragon is greedy. The almighty dollar is so important to her. Apparently she is $30,000 in debt on a Line of Credit. Can't help but giggle. Apparently a good $18,000 of that are legal fees. Again can't help but laugh. Maybe you should have thought twice about fighting Max in court as to whether he can have his daughter for Father’s Day, or a week in the summer or whether I or his Mother can pick up Jessie when he is unavailable as she quite frequently does on her end. Or the fact that he gave you TWO offers to settle over the past two years and you flat out refused to read them. Sorry, I am failing to feel sorry for you.  And to top this debt off, apparently her puppet friend Beth is moving out. And well, she owns half the house and that means needing to buy her out. Oh, the grass wasn't so green on the other side eh?  Your little fantasy world didn't pan out. And now you have to pay the price.

So what does all this mean? You are 30 some years old.  You have a $30,000 debt. You need to find money to buy out your former puppet friend. But you have no credit and the bank won't give you a dime. You can't co-own a home on your own so you need to request from the bank that your parents co-sign. They won’t do that also. You will likely never make a salary to independently, self-sufficiently live on your own, so I am guessing the new boyfriend will soon become the next money train.  You have no retirement savings.

Really, you have nothing. No money. No credit. No savings. No plans financially for the future. No happiness. Anxiety and worry over your need for control. Jealously and resentment. Spite.

Your Karma is much bigger than I ever thought.  Smile.